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Robert Lund and Spaff.com Shakespearean Pie 
If Don McLean's biggest hit and William Shakespeare's biggest hit had a bastard child, it might look something like this.

In 2005, M. Spaff Sumsion's lyrics won Amiright's first Song of the Year contest and the site's denizens double-dog-dared Robert Lund to record this behemoth. He worked on it on and off for three years, and the result is this song, which went to #2 in Dr. Demento's Top Ten and was even cited in an otherwise-respectable Shakespeare textbook.

Listen for cameos from FuMP members Carrie "Ophelia" Dahlby and Tom "Hamlet" Smith.

This song is now available on the following CDs:
2008-02-15 Hurricane
Entertain us, do we not laugh in joy? ;) This tune is awesome, a definite comedy hit right here.
2008-02-15 LoonieBin
2008-02-15 JakeWaters
Very clever lyric writing, and a great musical production! You guys rule!
2008-02-15 madmanOTL
2008-02-15 TakeruSTakomi
Rob, you know I have to now show this to my English professors. This is amazing. Very well written, and I love how you worked in non-Shakespearean references throughout the song as well.
2008-02-15 chewy's brother
Forsooth, methinks this lyrical escapade doth hit my eras with the fine skill of troubadours long since past into obscurity only to be irregularly brought to mind by the perseverance of lecturers too old to bridge the generational span. This Terpsichorean ditty dost prevail, whence others in their tired and staid orations falls short of the masters mark and leads youth to a greater understanding of the pentameter. I praise thee and would place thee in my highest regard and will remember your efforts after you have voyaged onto that undiscovered country that the most intellectual of vulcans knows not of. Huzzah for you, Robert of the Lund and Lord Spaff the lyrical.
2008-02-15 bruceski
I didn't think any song would make me smile more than "Take Back the Music." You have proven me wrong, good sir.
2008-02-16 dino-mike
Damn, makes me wish I paid attention in High School Lit.
2008-02-16 djseamus
"Gwenyth with her wardrobe gone..." he he. So not only are Lund and Spaff great song writers, they're grade A students! Awesome job Lady Carrie and Lord Tom with ye grand auld filke efforts! As Willie once said: "If music be the food of love, play on"!
2008-02-17 lukeski
Roses are red, violets are blue, Robert Lund is awesome, and so is Spaff. :)
2008-02-18 Molakwae
I'd like to dedicate this song to every English teacher out there, and wish they all had the sense of humor required to laugh at it. Hilarious!
2008-02-18 shoebox
Jesus, you guys are above and beyond on this one. Nicely done!! -=ShoEboX=-
2008-02-18 wildcard9
Where was this song when I was studying the place back in school?
2008-02-19 peterfump9
Wow! Nice work!
2008-02-20 Spaff.com
Thank you all for the lovely lovely comments. I told Ophelia - er, Carrie - that I would probably get a bunch of people saying, "Hey! Weird Al already did this song, you loser!" That hasn't happened so far, but it's never too late.
2008-02-20 peterfump9
Hey! Weird Al already did this song, you loser! ;-)
2008-02-21 ProjectSisyphus
An epic masterpiece. Friends, Romans, FuMPians
2008-02-25 seamonkey
I do not feel worthy of being called a parody artist after hearing this. FREAKING BRILLIANT! Shakespear gives me tired-head, but this song gives me major smile-face!! "Don't taze me bro"? You ACTUALLY worked that in there? Spaff, you're a freakin' genius and Lund delivers it perfectly! This shall be shared 'cross the land! HAIL THEE MASTERS OF PARODY... and all that other medieval crap!
2008-02-25 seamonkey
Yeah, I spelled it "Shakespear" without the extra "e" on the end. Sue me. Positive Attitude told me how to spell it.
2008-02-28 ShavaSue
Okay, I can't stop listening to this or sending it to friends in the SCA. I'd really love to learn it for Bardic Circles but the idea of trying to transcribe it makes my brain twist in odd ways. It's brilliant and I love it!!! Thanks for making my week.
2008-02-28 Spaff.com
Muchas gracias, y'all, even though methinks you protest too much.

ShavaSue: No fair - *my* chapter of Sexual Compulsives Anonymous doesn't have "Bardic Circles," and if the euphemism means what I think it does, I'm getting screwed. (So to speak.) But, hey, don't try to transcribe this beast. Click the LYRICS link above, or simply go here:

2008-02-29 ericcoleman
Amazing ...
2008-03-03 woodwytch
2008-03-15 robin_the_spiffy
Tom Smith's cameo appearance is absolutely hilarious. pity about the rest of the song though.
2008-11-14 scorpio_sting_videos
love it
2010-04-05 rosencrantz
an excellent song, well digested in the scenes, set down with as much modesty as cunning. I remember, one said there were no sallets in the lines to make the matter savoury, nor no matter in the phrase that might indict the author of affectation; but called it an honest method, as wholesome as sweet, and by very much more handsome than fine.
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