HomeFuMP ArchiveFuMP VideosThe FuMP SideshowAbout The FuMPFeatured ArtistsThe FuMP Online Store
Scooter Picnic I Can't Wrap 
Insane Ian and TV's Kyle have teamed up to bring you something-or-other. This is a song about being woefully, woefully male at Christmas and being unable to wrap a simple present.

This song is now available on the following CDs:
2011-12-23 wildcard9
Wrapping presents, my dreaded kryptonite!! I think gift bags and tissue paper was invented to take pity on people like us who can't wrap.
2011-12-23 Carrie Dahlby
I fully expected a parody of "I Can't Dance" by (I think) Rod Stewart. Wrapping is easy! SHUT UP IAN AND/OR KYLE!!!! :)
2011-12-23 ScooterPicnic
Carrie, the very fact that you are female and think wrapping presents is easy entirely legitimizes and proves the point of this song. Thank you!

Also, "I Can't Dance" was by Genesis, with Phil Collins, but we won't hold that against you. ^_^


2011-12-23 mrwompy
I heard this one the latest Dr. Demento show and laughed like crazy! Great!!!
2011-12-23 EclecticLee
Pity the artist who posts two days before Christmas and expects comments. :-) I'm a straight male who can wrap (but probably not rap). It's not *that* hard. Not so good with the tissue paper in the bags, though. Never been taught the proper technique. Anyway, it's a fun song.
2011-12-24 Jeff Reuben
Clever idea, this is fantastic!
2011-12-26 lukeski
I am a male who can wrap and rap. For example the lyrics "I can't dance like a GENESIS weapon" (Carrie ;P). This song fills me with happy! Merry Christmas, and as Tiny Tim said, "Shut up, everyone!"
2011-12-27 madmanOTL
As someone who is mechanically inept, I was asked by people in my family to not wrap presents after using a hot glue gun a couple of years ago. Love the song.
2012-01-03 Toff
Fortunately, I now have a wife who can wrap gifts for me.
You must be logged in to leave a comment.
Show your support for the artists of the FuMP by making a donation or signing up for a premium subscription.
Level 1 Subscription
Level 1 gives you access to all the high quality (320k) MP3s, including all the songs in our archive. Click here for more information.
Level 2 Subscription
Level 2 gives you access to all the high quality (320k) MP3s, including all the songs in our archive, plus you will receive our bi-monthly compilation CDs with some great bonus material. Click here for more information.
Donate To The FuMP
Any amount is greatly appreciated by our artists.
Host A Banner Ad
Tell all your visitors about The FuMP by placing a banner ad on your site. Click here for the available banners.
Podcast Promo
If you host a podcast please consider running our promo on your show to spread the word.
Have a funny song? Submit it for consideration. If we use it you will be paid and your song will be included on the next FuMP compilation CD.

Click on the link below to submit a song.
Get the latest songs for free, downloaded automatically, or hear Luke Ski and Devo Spice discuss the most recently posted songs.
Click here for podcast info.
C'mon... be our friend! Please?
The FuMP on MySpace
The FuMP on Facebook
The FuMP on Twitter
Radio stations can now download 320k MP3 files ready for broadcast directly from TheFuMP.com. Click on the link below for more information.