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Bad Beth and Beyond My Therapist Thinks You're an Asshole This song contains language that may be objectionable to some listeners and may not be suitable for radio broadcast.

My therapist thinks you’re an asshole
I have to concur that she’s right
For when I show up at the gang bang
Your asshole is nowhere in sight

Asshole, asshole
You are an asshole to me, to me
Asshole, asshole
A soul mate you never will be

My therapist thinks that you’re lazy
I have to concur you’re a dud
For when I bite heads off of chickens
You won’t help me clean up the blood (Chorus)

My therapist thinks that you’re lacking
The traits of responsible men
And all I can find is this tampon
While my crack pipe is missing again (Chorus)

My therapist thinks you have issues
Avoidance or self-sabotage
And probably why you won’t play with 
Those kids locked up in my garage (Chorus)

My therapist thinks that you stifle
Creative, artistic domains
Because you object to my sculptures
Made out of your mother’s remains (Chorus)

But . . .

My therapist says I’m not perfect
Admitting my faults hurts the most
So I’m sorry I burned down that convent
The nuns trapped inside were all toast! (Double chorus)
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