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2017-07-22
Derwood Bowen Bitcoin Pimp feat. Brenden Strange

People see me on the street with a chain around my neck made of glued together strips of yellow construction paper, and a Smart Phone showing an image of a dolla' sign! Yeah, they call me a tool, but they don't even know...

I'm a Bitcoin Pimp, a Bitcoin Pimp,
In a virtual system I've risen to the top
I'm a Bitcoin Pimp, a Bitcoin Pimp,
Tell the common dollar users I'll never be stopped!

Let me tell you how I made it big in this scene
From the time I was born, until I was eighteen
My parents saved some money and invested in me
So that I could go to college and get a degree
But once they gave me access to the account
That's when I rebelled and went my own route
I put it all in Bitcoin when it was brand new
And now look at how much my investment grew
I started when the site was at its beginning
Now its value's increasing, and I'm constantly gaining
But while it's still in cult status, real life's a slump
I live in a trailer that looks like a dump
I'm servin' burgers for minimal pay
And gettin' by on the food I can afford each day
My life didn't quite go as I planned,
But on the internet my status still stands...

I'm a Bitcoin Pimp, a Bitcoin Pimp,
In a virtual system I've risen to the top
I'm a Bitcoin Pimp, a Bitcoin Pimp,
And my account number can never be stopped

I can get illegal drugs from the highest of high
And multiple girlies to be by my side
As long as they exchange within the system
It's easier than breathing for me to get wit' em
I got game, and I ain't afraid to spit it
I can get 'em what they want, I mean within limits
Independently sold hand-crafted dresses are winners
It's just such a shame I can't treat 'em to dinner
My crib looks like a tornado came its way
But it's their preferred currency with which I can pay
So even in a dumpy life, I still keep 'em all pleased
Now roll out the keg of macaroni and cheese
I made some dumb life choices, but they worked out somehow
I got most of what I want and that's good enough for now
But I can't wait for the day the US dollar is gone
And to Bitcoin the rest of the world catches on

I'll be an actual pimp, an actual pimp
On a gold throne with my girlies eatin' lamb, steak, and shrimp
I'll be an actual pimp, an actual pimp,
But until that day I'll settle as a Bitcoin Pimp!

[Robber]: Yo, gimme all your money!
[Me]: Um, okay, um... let's see... not that pocket... Um, ah, that pocket, yes, I've got, um... 57 cents.
[Robber]: Is that all?
[Me]: Uh, I got a password protected Smart Phone.
[Robber]: Man, you ain't even worth my time, I'm outta here!

Highway robbers don't even know...

I'm a Bitcoin Pimp, a Bitcoin Pimp,
I got nothing to lose that a robber can take
I'm a Bitcoin Pimp, a Bitcoin Pimp,
Got my riches in a system that's foolproof and safe
I'm a Bitcoin Pimp, a Bitcoin Pimp
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