If you follow politics these days you're gonna find Big problems we are facing more than plenty So Democrats must promise that we'll gladly get behind Any Functioning Adult in 2020 We've got a lot of candidates ensuring much debate Among the pundits and the cognoscenti Don't get me wrong, that's fine as long as we just nominate Any Functioning Adult in 2020 Any functioning adult will be a real relief From a narcissist illiterate twitterer in chief I know that means the bar is pretty low but what the hell I would welcome any decent normal person who can spell, and read, and who actually knows what's in Article 2 of the Constitution So sure, discuss the issues with your neighbors &your friends As you sip your Starbucks frappucchino (venti) But let's agree a functioning democracy depends On Any Functioning Adult in 2020 While we're at it let's dispense with "likeability" Which just gets applied to women, yeah, misogyny And don't insist 'the country isn't ready yet', oh please For a qualified contender who possesses ovaries, or who's gay, or a person of color, or Jewish or Muslim, and by the way a woman DID win popular vote last time,just sayin' So turn out for the primaries and vote for your first pick To replace this would-be fascist presidente But no matter who gets nominated we've all gotta stick with Any Functioning Adult in 2020 I'd take Kamala, Beto, even creepy Uncle Joe Or Elizabeth or Amy, or that white guy what's his name-y Julian Castro's kinda sweet, or that sexy Mayor Pete, Frankly I'd even vote for a woowoo guru with her aura When events are so tormenty Let's not get all dissent-y To Any Functioning Adult in 2020!