“I Bet I Can Eat More Waffles Than You” Lyrics and vocals by Insane Ian Music by Bonecage Steez by Ninja Sex Party [Spoken] Rise and shine, beautiful. I’ve got a big day planned... Good morning gorgeous Hope you enjoyed the coitus That we shared in my bed, (Yeah!) All. Last. Night. (You know it was awesome) Get up and get dressed (because you’re so very naked) So we can have some breakfast, ‘cause Now it is time for you and me to go compete And then we’ll eat all we can eat I bet I can eat more waffles than you! So that’s what I’m gonna do! Waffles are the most perfect food! And I’ve got a lot to prove! This interlude Seems to have you confused, baby It’s real simple. Y’see WAFFLES RULE (They’re better than pancakes) Each little gap (they kinda look like my abs) Is a butter and syrup trap, so Clear your schedule and hide that hickey Cause it’s time for you and me to get sticky I bet I can eat more waffles than you! So let the contest begin! Waffles are my favorite food! And there’s no way you’ll win! Won't listen to pancake chatter They're like waffles but they're flatter And they both use the same batter But to me that doesn't matter Waffle carbs give staying power Unlike last night I’ll last for hours Eggs, and milk, sugar, flour Builds a tasty Eiffel Tower Add the syrup, melt the butter Sticky-ness makes my heart flutter Get your mind out of the gutter [Spoken] Oh wait, you’ve started? Gotta catch up! One waffle down! Two waffles down! Three...oh god, why’d they have to be Belgian?! I bet I can (gah) waffles than you! Just give me another shot! I can’t believe I’ve only had two! This is tougher than I thought! [Spoken] OH GOD!
The FuMP
2021-01-01
Artist
Insane Ian
Insane Ian has been a little...shall we say, obsessed with the band Ninja Sex Party as of late. So much so that he's recorded a pastiche of their early style, based on one of their rejected song titles. This comes from his newest release, "The Sex Training EP", a collection of songs inspired by NSP, available now on Bandcamp (or as a reward for certain backers of the NSP tribute album he produced last year. Like I said, slightly obsesed).
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