Christmas Eve had started we were all excited from the cheer
We waited in our cozy beds for Santa to appear
My heart started to pound with glee like the hoof prints up above.
The big man in red and his crazy sled, so full of joy and love

But then there came a jarring plop, like a bag of wet cement
But that was nothing to the smell that came in every vent

Rudolph dropped a package on my rooftop
Now we can’t get anywhere near the tree
We’ve had to evacuate for Christmas,
That stinky little reindeer made us flee.

This year we all had such high hopes for Christmas
We’d all been so very good all year.
We thought nothing could be worse than a stocking full of coal
Until the gift plopped out of Rudy's rear

Rudolph dropped a package on my rooftop.
Now we can’t get anywhere near the tree
We’ve had to evacuate for Christmas
That kind of roasted chestnut ain't for me

He puts the rude in Rudolph, and as the leader of the crew
He was their number one, so they all did number two… a chain reaction
Prancer assumed the stance, while Dancer filled his pants
And just then in the flash, Dasher took out the trash
Donner did the honors, Cupid got all putrid
Comet dropped a bomb
While Vixen and Blitzen took a… oh my...

Rudolph dropped a package on my rooftop
Those ain't sugar plums, oh no no no
We’ve had to evacuate for Christmas
I'm sure glad Santa don't drive buffalo
You know I'm glad, so glad, Santa don't drive no crazy buffalo
Santa! You drive that sleigh safe now, tip your elves
Rudolph has left something on the building