Lyrics (ttto: "Snoopy vs. The Red Baron" by Phil Gernhard and Dick Holler)

After the turn of the century,
From the bay near Miskatonic University,
Came a roar and a thunder made the whole place shake,
Like a sleeping Great Old One coming awake.

Not of our world, from far out in space,
A huge winged thing with tentacles on his face.
So many men tried, so many men died,
Or got locked up in asylum when their brains were fried.

Ten, twenty, thirty, forty thousand or more,
The dread Cthulhu was running up the score.
Adventurers died very stupidly,
You can't play Call of Cthulhu like D&D.

In the nick of time, a scholar arose,
A funny looking dog with a big black nose.
He flew around the world, he couldn't relax
Seeking mind-crippling manuscripts and artifacts.

Ten, twenty, thirty, forty thousand or more,
The dread Cthulhu was running up the score.
Adventurers died very stupidly,
You can't play Call of Cthulhu like D&D.

Now Snoopy swore he’d defeat that god,
So he researched this giant slimy hexapod.
He met Cthulhu at the Arkham city line,
And while the Old One was laughing, he got out an Elder Sign.
Cthulhu was helpless, he flailed his claws,
But he’d been bound in accordance with the ancient laws.
Snoopy cast a spell, and opened up a gate,
And Cthulhu got sucked through to meet his fate.

Ten, twenty, thirty, forty thousand or more,
The dread Cthulhu was running up the score.
Adventurers died very stupidly,
You can't play Call of Cthulhu like D&D.