The power of soap is a beautiful thing
You can choose Dial or Lever, or some Irish Spring
Scrape off them briefs, get in there and scrub
This is more than a hint, buddy, you don't shower enough

You reek like the dumpster, behind taco bell
I know some ferrets with a sexier smell
If your calendar's empty, you got no invites
Better lather it up, or stay home tonight

You know you’re stinky, like the johns on a plane
You smell like a St. Bernard, coming in from the rain
You're foul and you're funky, bringing tears to my eyes
You need to sanitize, you don't shower enough
You don't shower enough

The first time you wash it, it might burn a bit
Parting those layers of grime in your pits
Just keep on going, you ain't gonna drown
Don't make me take you through the carwash with the windows down

You know you're rancid, like a three day rave
You smell like Dr. Frankenstein, out digging up graves
You're gross and you're nasty, you need fungicide
and you outrank low-tide

I'm saying change your underwear, you're really ripe down there
Oh good lord what'd you do, did you make number two
Take a damn firehose to that crust, you don't shower enough
Stanky guitar!

You know you're putrid, like an open drain
You're a walking wedgie, you're a human pit-strain
You're a Frenchman in a rendering plant, burning a pig with peritonitis
Not to mention your chronic gingivitis

You need to shower, you don't shower enough
You’re growing mushrooms, and you oughta floss and brush
You don't shower enough
You don't shower enough
You don't shower enough